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Some of you may be thinking, "I'm better off just parenting on my own". If it is safe for your child to be with your co-spouse, you're wrong. According to research, children are better adjusted in several different domains when their parents have joint custody, compared to sole-custody. They are better adjusted in their relationships, self-esteem, emotions, and display less conflict. Therefore it is crucial to try to co-parent, for your child's well-being (3).
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Divorce can bring on immense amounts of stress and problem behaviors in children. Here are a few tips to help alleviate this time for your child and become the best co-parent you can be.
Get on the same page as your co-Parent
Divorce is a major change in both you and your child's life. Being on the same page as your co-parent is the first step to adjusting to this new "normal".
You and your co-parent should be consistently updating each other about the changes in your child's life, schedules, activities, and routines. It is important to be on the same page, so that your child does not miss events.
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Before the divorce:
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Set up a time to tell the children you're getting a divorce together
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Make sure to tell your child that it is NOT their fault
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This is especially vital for parents with younger children as they often blame themselves for their parents' separation​
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Make sure you have agreed on a way of telling your child
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Make sure you do this before any major changes occur (one parent moving out of the house, etc)
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After the Divorce:
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Have a Schedule:
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Use sharable calendar like Google Calendar
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Meet weekly/talk on the phone to go over schedules
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Schedule visitation hours
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Keep the same schedule​
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